enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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Trust. Believe in the process.

Well a good day.

C. called at about 11 to invite me over for breakfast, so after the coffee mishap I gradually made my way over there. We had a great time discussing dumb economics papers - e.g. the one by Alan Bl!nder applying human capital theory to tooth brushing - whilst eating omelette and drinking good coffee.

C. had last weekend's paper, so I read the arts section in the sunlight. He has a wonderful view of a tennis court in a leafy park from his window. I like it.

I was starting to get a headache and rather sniffly though, so C. in mid-afternoon gave me one of his allergy tablets.

My goodness was it ever strong! I usually take the non-drowsy 24 hour kind, and they have an imperceptible effect. This time I felt exactly as I did when my mother used to give me antihistamines as a kid: I was knocked completely out. I basically slept intermittently throughout the rest of the afternoon.

After getting up I turned on the radio only to discover that it was the last program EVER of my tied-for-favourite radio program! I am truly chagrined. This is horrible! I'm so depressed over it.

Well, not that depressed.

See that's the thing. My life is moving along very slowly. Change is happening almost imperceptibly. But change is happening. Positive change. Very gradually I've taken control of small things in my operational life and in my space and this is good news. Gradually, patiently, I will achieve all objectives.

This evening, for example, I went through a bunch of clothes and boxes in my bedroom. I have a huge pile prepared for charity. I have a lifetime's worth of stuff stuffed into my apartment, and after all of those moves and all of those life changes it is time to divest myself of most of it. I would have done it sooner but in part not having a car has hindered me.
It's difficult to do.

On another level I just haven't been ready to do it yet. I get the sense that this desire to get going on this now is reflective of the fact that I really am ready to move to another stage of life, one fuller and more satisfying.

I calmly progressed today.

I read a little bit of Shakespeare as well, at my window in the dusk light. Nice.

And then I organized my papers for Italy, and looked over the maps to plan a change of distance for the bike ride tomorrow. I think that C. will come with me. It's a lovely weekend, and thankfully we also have Monday off. I have plenty of time to get more done - reading, drawing (yes, I will!).

I'd post some pics of C's place now but I've been so weary all day with the allergy issues and the tablet of doom given by C. A demain.

Take care and sleep tight!

10:12 p.m. - 2008-08-30

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