enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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In which I complain. But only a little bit.

Ohhh...I must admit that I had very inadequate sleep last night. My boss frazzles me. I am suffering with anxiety at the moment.

But at least I can diagnose this, and really I don't feel depressed or sad or anything...so whatever.

I keep on looking around at other people with other jobs, and when I do the cost benefit analysis I don't see that I'm in such a bad position. For now I need to continue to be patient. It will be a year in mid-November, and then I can reasonably think of moving.

I really don't want to "think" about my job. I don't "think" that it is productive. :)

But my point in bringing this up is that I feel pretty crappy because I had too little sleep last night. I was doing well until about 4:30 p.m. and then I started to feel sleepy. :)

Well, at least this means that I am home at a reasonable hour. :)

What else? Oh. I suppose that since I'm grumpy and tired I'm unlikely to be making any phone calls tonight. You know who you are. My apologies. One of the next couple of days for sure!

Ummm....saudades would like to see the cover of my Florence journal. Let me see. It comes in a bag, which I LOVE.

I picked it very quickly because I immediately loved the colour. It's very A Room with a Vi3w, is it not?

Oh, and one of my chunky monk3y seance of last weekend for good measure (minus chunky monk3y):

The journal above is where all of the juicy stuff goes. :) Really, I tend to put poetry and quotes of literature in there more than anything. Nothing about me is very juicy. I'm more of a ploddingly earnest person. Which is why I don't have a boyfriend. :(

Speaking of which, I'm weary with respect to EVERYTHING today. I do not care what I look like. I do not look up when men look at me. At a stoplight today I actively avoided the attractive man in the suit who was checking me out. I'm just tired. I hope it doesn't last.

I'm very excited about going to Italy in September though. When an insomniac last night I read further into Vasari's Lives of the Art!sts and I was enjoying it immensely.

On the other hand, I haven't heard from M. at all in the last two weeks. I do care and yet I don't. When I think of my trip I think of my art course. I think it is a good thing that it is scheduled for 10 of the 15 days that I will be there. (And he he how does anyone feel about an affair with a foppish art instructor? ;-)) I might be pleasantly surprised about what ends up coming up in the evenings and otherwise, and really, I need to move on. At the same time, putting the negative spin on everything is my habit. He's probably just no less busy than he was two weeks ago, since summer is when he makes all of his money.

All I can say is WHATEVER. What do you think - a Guinness night?

I think I need to go and check out magazine ads more vigorously. Manfromvenus has piqued my interest. Plus, it is GREAT to have real magazine suggestions from someone as qualified as is hungryghost. Thank you!! Oh and Fifi: You can call me 150% of anything, anytime. THANKS!

5:58 p.m. - 2008-07-29

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other diaries:

stepfordtart
ohell
awittykitty
annanotbob
manfromvenus
smartypants
fifidellabon
hungryghost
hissandtell