enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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I do hope that my time is at least somewhat near.

So the date.... :) Tricky. What a lovely, lovely guy. Unfortunately he's not attractive at all. I mean, physically, he's really out of shape. Though he's working to get into shape. There is something attractive about his eyes and his face in general - I think because he's such a wonderful person - but compared to him I'm Cinderella. And I don't say that lightly, as I know that I'm not beautiful.

We talked for five hours though, so that is really something. He was such a gentleman and so sensitive and kind though - and insisted on buying lunch and never ONCE looked at his blackberry (thank god, he turned it over, even though he owns his own software development firm) and tipped well - so I kept in the conversation and at least tried to make it a worthwhile experience for both.

So, I don't know. I could continue to get to know him, but I'm not sure if it could last, or if I could get hot for him. I feel quite disappointed and feel a bit like crying over it, but at the same time at least I'm getting closer and closer to the mark in the sense of dating people who are not wasting my time and who are actually worth being with (unlike Larry who was hot and confident and stylish and a complete waste of breath). So, there you have it...it seems I will not be having sex any time in the near future, but hopefully still again before I die. I have to get lucky at some point!

OK. I'm going to go and cry a little bit now. Sometimes I just ache with loneliness and impatience. This guy is really a special guy, but I suppose that one has to wait for someone who is more matched in physical terms. :( He does have beautiful, soulful eyes. But that is all.

I suppose the other thing that I should mention is that he doesn't have a great deal of class in his speech patterns, although he is clearly very very smart. I think I could overlook the speech habits given how lovely he is, if he had more of a body to which I felt attracted. I am a horrible person. OK. Crying time now. Maybe it is going to be the poet scientist after all. I know that he is crazy about me and at least I do not find him unattractive. I'm so tired of being alone. Why do I have to have standards and patience?

6:13 p.m. - 2008-05-03

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