enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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Thank you thank you thank you wonderful, caring women!

You guys are the awesomest most wonderful people. I am so happy and grateful to have the connection with you in my life, if over the Internet.

I'm so drunk! This is why I am not writing to you individually at the moment.

I'm so excited! I think it really is a wheat thing. You have no idea how miserable I hve been, for months! In fact, even for years I can remember having these problems. And tonight, and all day today, I feel so much better than I have felt in so long. I just *know* the difference. My body, my abdomen hasn't felt like this in sooooo long. I should have known that there was something physically wrong with me. I should have known it. But I think I have a very high pain threshold.

Oh! It is great to know. As I was saying by email to C., what a miracle to know that the fatigue and even feeling too sad and having to work too hard to be myself could be related to not absorbing nutrients properly because my digestive system wasn't working properly and I was poisoning myself! It's like magic.

All I can say is this: Thank goodness that wine contains no gluten! Thank goodness! (ALso, I will thank the gods of whatever and whatever that Pineau des Charentes is also not on the forbidden list.)

So you will find Ms. EB in Italy in four weeks or so, not eating dear dear pasta and such but completely drunk on red wine and fresh water. Oh and sketching. And cute bicycle dudes. He wrote me this: If you could arrange your travel plans to do...The Amazing Ride (this is what I named the tour in Val d�Orcia�), that would be wonderful!

Uh huh! Amazing ride is what I am after. ;)

That was for you, Fifi.

I am lonely sometimes, but mostly I am not. I am very lucky to have incredible friends, both in life and in writing. It is wondeful. I also have myself, whom I am coming to know more and more. I can see what matters to me more clearly, and more and more each day I get closer to the vision that I have in mind for my life and for the person whom I want to become. I am very fortunate. :)

I toast you all! (Only I don't have any alcohol at home. Also, I am a cheap drunk, so my glass has been empty for a while.)

Incidentally, I am drunk because I had a nice chat with my landlord tonight. he is really a nice man. We've found a perfect detente. He does not hit on me anymore. He really gets me - I suppose in a way I am an old soul. It is nice to have an artist in my life.

Last night, I was drunk with DAN! Can you believe it? He took me out for an expensive dinner and wine and for once I did not protest about this. We had the funniest conversation in which I imitated a harp at one point and then did a physical demonstration of the location of the piriformis muscle. Quite innocently. Some wine was involved. Fully clothed though, mind you - do not fret.

OK. Work is shit but that is what it is supposed to be.

La vita e bella. :)

10:19 p.m. - 2008-04-01

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