enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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Mornings, mornings, mornings.

ACK. I so don't want to go to work.

Why am I not able to call in sick?

I need to pump myself up. I really need to start getting up to run! It's difficult.

I think that maybe, too, I need to crush my idealism, because this morning I was thinking, "I should become a journalist and travel all around the world telling important stories!"

Even though just yesterday evening I was feeling grateful that I'm an economist, given that I do have the potential to move to many places with this skill set.

Last night, C. pointed out the idealism, writ large. He was talking about going to Chicago to visit his brother in August, and I had an elaborate plan worked out whereby we could go together. And then C. said, "Where are you going to get the time and money, moneybags? You're going to Italy in September."

Oh yeah. Oops.

I just don't live in the real world. I need to be aware of this, and not drop the ball at my job. It *is* a good job and I should be grateful.

I really should stop thinking again. The thinking isn't good for me. But I need to figure out another way to get through the day. Fortunately things usually get easier once I get going.

It's important, too, to remember that "Wherever you go, there you are." Moving to Paris probably isn't going to make being an economist a more dreamy occupation.

Well, c'est tout. The clock is ticking. I look nice (black wrap dress with short sleeves, blue and wood necklace). I can buy a coffee and that will crank up the energy. Hopefully. And I can think about getting home to continue knitting my red sweater.

8:49 a.m. - 2008-07-22

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