enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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six months might be my limit

Six months without an Italia fix might just be my limit.

I mean, there's definitely something physically wrong with me - I slept for 10 hours last night between my nap in the evening and my actual sleep and I still feel tired - but I just. feel. so. worn. out.

At the end of today I had to change something that had been reviewed by someone else, and then someone else came and asked for something else...and I couldn't help myself from thinking, "You've got to be kidding. More?"

Yes. It's like I've ground to a halt and I just can't face any more of the same crap! AACK! WORK! ACK!

Every time I think of the backlogs in the airports and the potential problems if the volcanic activity increases again...I just want to snap my fingers and be in Florence.

C. got mad at me today. He told me I should just go ahead and buy a ticket direct to Rome, which is not likely to close, and delay my trip to London until later in the year. As much as I'd like such a simple solution, I don't really want to lay out the other money (although I could change my original ticket to the fall, I'm sure, for a fee). That feels like unncessary laziness, panic, etc. I'm sure I'll feel more cheery about everything in a couple of days. I did, however, find a $700 ticket direct from Montreal to Rome for three weeks in May.

But that would be too easy. And it's only stupid money - paper - if I have to buy a more expensive ticket in a couple of weeks if my flight is cancelled. (Honestly, what kind of worries me is getting lost in transit if I can't get from London to Italia for some reason. I just don't have the energy.)

I don't know.

Frankly, I just don't want to think about it. I'm in a bad mood and I am tired. And I still have to work tomorrow.

Well, that's it. I could tell you about arguing over econometrics with C. over dinner -which I didn't want to do, but he wanted to pick my stupid brain - and I could also tell you about the stupid radio program I am listening to about how to make babies smarter...But the thing is people that you don't want to make babies smarter in THAT way, because trust me, I know THAT way of being smart and it's a hellish, rotten way to live. It's like cursing your baby for life. Why would you want that? Why don't you focus on the other types of intelligences that are much more productive and happiness-inducing?

OK. That's my rant for today. I have nothing to complain about, I know. Boo hoo, my vacation might be disrupted and boo hoo I am well-paid to work for a living.

Boo hoo indeed. I embarrass myself. I'm going to go to sleep.

XOXOX

9:36 p.m. - 2010-04-22

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