enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

merde, late again!

Hey friends,

I've been up for a while. If you can believe it, I got up to iron this morning. I find ironing very annoying. HOw about you? I think it's not so much the task as that I don't have enough time for everything. Even though I'm not working or living the most crazy lifestyle, I find that so many things suck time and I get to 11 p.m. at night and I wish I had at least another hour.

Oh well.

LAst night was terrible! I completely under-described the allergy attack that I had last night. It was terrible. I couldn't stop my nose from running and my eyes from weeping and I got the worst headache by the end of it. I had wanted to draw, but I couldn't do anything at all and so I got into bed. I had a very strange and unsettled sleep, in which I dreamed I was flying to Australia.

Anyhow. :)

I've been reading the H@ppiness Project website lately, as as I noted earlier this week I am trying to arm my personal arsenal with all sorts of useful habits. So far, for my own list, I think I've decided on the following:

1) As I noted the other day, Act as you want to feel works for me. I think it's key, as Fifi confirmed, to act as if you know what you're doing, and also, of course, to be friendly and positive if those are things you want to feel. The action can definitely precede the feeling. That works.

2) Last night I had this thought as I was making my pizza (trying to make it, anyhow): Life is not perfectible. I guess this is a variant of "Great is the enemy of the good." I know I'm guilty of trying to perfect every detail of my life, make the right choices, etc. It's why I labour over something as stupid as whether or not I should buy a new skirt. Before I do that, I typically spend a week or two mulling it over. How stupid, no?

3) Now here's where my problems start. The first "commandment" that was clear to me was one that came from my personal arsenal: Run faster.

THis probably won't make any immediate sense to any of you, but it's something that I read once: "When you think you can't run faster, run faster."

What I discovered myself when I was running - and I discovered this with surprise - was the potency of mental barriers. I often thought I was running at my absolute maximum speed, that I could not run faster, but then I would concentrate really hard - on an interval with my club, for example - and I found I COULD run faster. Maybe not a lot, maybe not every day, but I COULD break barriers that I did not believe I could break.

The original quote referred to racing really. People often get tired in a race and they think it's over. Usually there's more in the tank than you think.

I think I'm rather like this in real life. In practise, when I'm doing something, I never believe that it can't be done. But when I think about things I haven't done yet - worked on my drawing, started a business, moved to Florence - I find I have massive mental barriers.

I don't know if this "commandment" is a stupid one that contradicts number two, but I kind of think it is useful.

Number 4) involves making positive assumptions about people, being compassionate, and cutting them slack. But I'm completely out of time and have to rush to work! But before I go, number 5) will definitely be Do what must be done. I really believe that you have to dive into tasks and not delay them. The more challenging the task the more you need to get started/get on it. I loathe procrastination. It's difficult to fight, but I really believe in taking on the tasks I don't want to take on. That's how I schedule my days at the moment, and it's working: don't let the crappy tasks sit. :)

XOXOX

8:30 a.m. - 2010-04-15

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next

other diaries:

stepfordtart
ohell
awittykitty
annanotbob
manfromvenus
smartypants
fifidellabon
hungryghost
hissandtell