enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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Judgment, bafflement, and going with the flow

Just finished writing my morning pages. They were full of random worries and shit this morning, but how I love them.

I also love the way that when I read the book it's as though she has predicted what has happened or will happen. (Aside: speaking of predictions, Anna, I hope you read your "cainer" in the last couple of days and also "free will." I love horoscopes. I don't care if everyone else thinks they're crap. I know I'm supposed to be a scientist. Not.) It's right on the money (the AW book, that is). I have complete faith in the process. I need to also start reading my compassion book tonight (thanks for the suggestion, Anna - got the P@ul Gilb3rt). I'm going to buy the Twyl@ Tharp (thanks, witty!). I'm not even going to tell you what the number of holds is on that book in the library catalogue.

Speaking of library catalogue, this library here is not well run at all. I had taken out the massive Herm!one L33 biography of Virgin!a Woolf (highly dense) a few weeks ago. I went to renew it and there was a hold on it so I had to return it. I think that the person who has it should be able to renew it to the normal max number of renewals, before the next person gets it. No? This way, I would have to put a hold on it to get it back in a couple of weeks, certainly before the other person has finished it. We could go back and forth endlessly, each person reading a couple of chapters. Frustrating! I'd have a word with them, but the library does hold lots of friendly, free events and exhibits and, well, I love librarians. I almost was one, except I would have been bored. Still, there is absolutely nothing better than a giant room full of books. Therein hope lies.

Anyhow. Nevermind. I am going to buy both the VW book and the Twyl@. I'll consider it doing my duty to support authors, which I believe in wholeheartedly.

What else was I thinking? I was thinking something interesting just a moment ago, I believe. I was listening to a piece on the radio about M@d M3n Barbi3s that are coming out. The commentator was commenting on the absence of liquor bottles and cigarettes. Yes, I know that smoking is bad for us, but one of the things that annoys me about our culture right now is that there is so much destructive crap that we continue to consume, only in slightly more benign form. Right now I'm thinking of all of the crap articles on the Internet about celebrities and how bad they looked at this or that event, and all of the gazillion time-wasting things we do with communication devices.

Meh. I'm a Victorian. We already knew that. I'd like nothing better than to have a pen pal who sent me beautiful letters. An epistolary romance. Now with that, I'd be happy. I suppose I do get funny emails from Marco. In the beginning they were romantic, which was always a treat. Now they're personal but funny. I was telling him about the guy who wrote to me on the dating site last week: "You look like a C maybe a D cup i'd do you.[sic]"

Marco wrote back: "What? Those Canadian men. I don't understand. Why is he only talking about your breasts? What about your legs, eyes?" ;)

Anyhow. All in good fun.

I need to go to French and so I need to get into the shower. I was thinking this morning that although I don't like speaking French in my daily life, one day, when I'm senile, I could see myself retreating into a world of Fratalian. I'll make sense to no one. And maybe I'll like it that way.

Have a wonderful day.

XOOX

8:16 a.m. - 2010-03-10

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