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enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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Um...a mixed bag.

Hey guys,

I had a pretty good day, although I have to say that I have discovered my limit. It's however many days I've gone out. My nerves are absolutely frayed at the moment.

So...I'm not proud of this, but I snapped at a guy who just tried to hit on me at the gym. He came up behind me when I was on a bike (after running) and was investigating my data. "Just checking up on you!" So I said, in a stern voice, "What do you think you are doing?" So he kept on smiling and said, "Just wanted to check up on how your workout is going!" "It was going fine until you interrupted me."

I feel badly about it. I hate it when men interfere with my workout though - it was the one space in which I had a moment to meditate and be at peace. I've had a bad week, as you know.

So I walked home from the gym feeling quite low about myself, as a result. If I see him next week I will apologize. I shouldn't have been so rude. I just don't expect someone to do that. I would never go up to someone I don't know when they are in the middle of intense exercise. But I'm particular, I guess.

All that said - mistakes happen, I guess, though I'm starting to question my sanity - I feel good at work. Things are OK. French was very positive today. I had a nice workout (until the dude interrupted me). Now it's time for some food.

I realized today that I was WAY more miserable going out every night last week than I am when I come home and read a good book, work on my knitting, maybe write to a friend. I don't know why I'm trying to mess that up by forcing myself into social situations I don't enjoy. Maybe I don't need a boyfriend at all. In any event, I just don't believe it's possible to find someone worth having anymore. Don't misinterpret this - I'm not sad or even angry. I'm just tired. I've had enough. :)

Hope you had a nice day.


XOXOX

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8:38 p.m. - 2010-02-10

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