enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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Since I KNOW that I create my own drama, why is it that I can't control this??

I have to laugh at my silly self, because I always do the same thing: I make a decision, know it is the right decision (analytically, that is - I wouldn't do something if everything didn't add up to nearly perfect), and THEN I spiral into worry AFTER the decision is a done deal. It's as though I need to undo all of the good work because it's what one is supposed to do...or something.

I think I'm OK now though! I didn't sleep a full night last night, but my mind is coming around to the move. And apart from finding a truck, the move itself shouldn't be too bad. I've decided to rent a truck and then hire a couple of dudes, but in a worst-case scenario I could do the move myself with C. I only have two or three somewhat heavy pieces (the loveseat, armchair and one dresser). I travel quite lightly.

So, no worries.

I wondered as I was lying in bed this morning if it's that I still don't believe that I deserve a beautiful place that costs more money. Certainly, I can afford it and I work hard.

Also, the area to which I am moving is really, really nice. The area in which I live right now I love, but it is downtown and there aren't very many nice cafes or bakeries or shops around here. The yuppified area to which I am moving of course has many lovely shops and bakeries. It's basically one of the two nicest areas in the city. The first is down by the Governor G3neral and PM's residences. There are mansions down there overlooking the river. This area is more of a two-income upper middle income sort of an area. It's old brownstones and Victorians all nicely restored, lots of kids, lots of community activities.

The two parts that I think I'll like the best are 1) the park just a couple of houses down from my place (a lovely green space with an inlet that darts out from the canal and that can be skated on to get to the canal a few blocks away, in the winter) and 2) the French boulangerie a couple of blocks away on the main drag and that makes the most wonderful croissant.

The community centre and a local high school offer many nice courses as well. I took my Italian class at the high school in question last autumn.

So doesn't that all sound nice??

There are also better supermarkets in the area, as we've already established.

I was joking with my colleagues yesterday that being in the area will throw me in the path of men who are homeowners. :) I've become Mrs. Bennett!

Ha!

Yes, I'm more relaxed today. A couple of nights of good sleep and everything will be great.

You guys are great. Thanks for your support!

I'm afraid that travel will now likely be off until the winter/spring. Certainly, if I get my promotion in November (no idea if that will happen - maybe 50-50) I will take a trip in the winter. If that doesn't happen until April, I'll likely plan for May next year. EEK! It will then have been a year since my last trip! I'm funny that way though - my travel comes in waves. Travel wave, rest. Travel wave, rest. Perhaps it's the normal course of things for me. And at the moment, to be honest, I'm tired. Drawing class tonight though!!

Off to work!

XO

8:47 a.m. - 2009-09-22

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