enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary
"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Got through today; health on the upswing. I exist. I'm doing OK. I'm feeling better, which is part of it. Midway through the day I had a coughing fit and three men from my unit came running. They all thought I was choking and thought they might have to save me! Funny! I was just coughing. I said that already. It's been a bad cough, as you can tell. I stayed in my office today. I can definitely feel myself accelerating into better health though. And even my sense of humour has returned! I was not that amused this morning, however, when Marco wrote to tell me that he is feeling lonely. I was hoping that he would stop emailing me for a while. I want that to be in the past. In a way, it already feels as if it is going there. So the summer begins. I set a tight deadline for myself for a project (next Wednesday for preliminary results), because I think the healthiest thing for me is going to be to NOT allow myself a moment to be slack. I'll feel better about my work if I throw myself back into it. As for other projects, I'm going to take the same approach. I gave the always procrastinating C. an ultimatum about giving me the heads up soon as to whether he can rent a van with me this weekend to pick up the furniture that I am going to by. Why wait until tomorrow to do what you can do today...? (Note: C. desperately needs to buy furniture himself as his apartment is a worse dump than mine! He has been talking about it for ages...) Believe it or not, I also need to buy a suit! I do not have a suit! It's shocking, I realize. I mean, I can sort of cobble together a suit from old suits that I have (the last one bought in 2002), but heavy grey wool pinstripe is, uh, better for winter. It's really strange that I am doing my job and don't have a suit, I realize. When I interviewed for the job I didn't even wear a suit - I wore a green cashmere sweater and a skirt. Funny, non? There are lots of suits in my ministry, but for the meetings that I attend (which is not many), since I do quantitative modeling, I only need to be smart business casual. So nice shirts and skirts will do. Sooo...I need to buy a suit. What a pain. I feel a bit like my Italian friend in this regard. Suits are annoying. I always find jackets to be constricting and uncomfortable. Anyhow. That's my grief for the day. I'm meant to spend more money this weekend, it seems. I HAVE been looking at the classifieds for second hand furniture though. Not a terrible idea for a wardrobe and a bookcase, I think. Only I don't have transportation... I got some money today, which seems a gift. A big cheque. It's actually bigger than I had thought, because I'm lame and underestimate things. Our wage settlement (contract renegotiation, inflation adjustment) for the last two years was long overdue. So I got back pay. Can you believe it? It's raining money. Only very soon the money will dry up. This money is going to pay for my trip. Am I ever glad though now that I took the art history course as well; the extra money that I didn't anticipate in this cheque is about the same amount as the course! I think that fate has a way of doing that to you. Call it the universe, if you like, but so be it. Well, that is good. I really ought to save more this year. I will not travel. I need to work harder and commit more to my job. I don't want to give people the impression that I am just waiting to shove off to Italy. This year must be the year of "blooming where you are," as artgnome so aptly suggested. I think it has probably been obvious to a bunch of you for a while that I needed to get my head out of the clouds and give my job and Ottawa a better share of my attention. And you would be correct. OK. Time for dinner. I still haven't grocery shopped. Must do. Bon. Hope you are well. |6:55 p.m. - 2009-06-03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- | ||||||
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