enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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All well.

OK. All is well again. I ate dinner at the hostel at 7 last night and then lounged about and slept until 7 this morning. Perhaps it was a the few days of wining and dining that came before! (There was a great deal of wining and dining.)

I keep on going back and forth on the Marco thing though. He's going to call me this morning and I don't know what to tell him. At one moment, I think "no." But then at another moment I think, "It's just a two hour class that I am trading tomorrow for a whole day of biking in the Chianti countryside." The other thing is that the two days that Marco proposed involved biking that is quite challenging, so he had clearly thought out the biking that he knew I would like best. He also picked routes I have never done before, so he remembered where I had gone with him.

I think it's easy to be angry with him - for telling me that we would take a few days to scout to Rome; for telling me that he wanted to celebrate our birthdays together with a special celebration; for not addressing either or a myriad of other things that he has proposed; for not calling me on my birthday - but I think that he's confused and thinks he's doing the best. He IS a kind person, I know, for he hasn't taken a penny from me since the first ride that I took with him, and since then has paid for my lunches, paid for my bike rental, taken me to all of the nicest places for drinks or dinner. He is a funny kind of a guy. Maybe he's just Italian. Maybe he's just a guy.

So for me it's all about deciding on the drawing. At this very second I'm leaning towards just going with Marco tomorrow, since I want to get this meeting out of the way. Clearly it has been driving me mental.

Anyhow! Energy is vaulted back up. I'm going to have some breakfast, a shower and then get dressed, or maybe a run first, and then I'm going to head out and buy some comfortable shoes...

XO and thanks for comments. I find it is totally normal for energy to come and go on a vacation. I have never once traveled, especially when busy or staying in a hostel, without having at least one grumpy day. It's work is traveling! But I love it. Today I'm going to pack full of churches and galleries.

Also, just to celebrate some of the ridiculously awesmoe good fortune I have had here, I'll tell you that that Korean girl I mentioned earlier has been sendng me all sorts of the most amazing links to dream art courses that I could do!!!

7:20 a.m. - 2009-05-18

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