enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Now it is time for sleep.

Well, I just read my dear friend manfromvenus's entry about his work issues, so I feel a bit stupid about posting here.

I have been inordinately extravagant since I have been here. But now I will pull the belt in!

I hardly want to write about this as it seems a stupid thing to bring the great day down with this... (Though I suppose it is now the 14th...)

That bastard M. didn't call or email. I didn't think he would; he's incredibly literal and he said he would call when he got back from Switzerland and that is supposed to be later in this week. But how annoying! I knew that that was what he meant, and that is wht he did. He sent a card last week, and in his eyes that's enough.

I think it's stinky though. Even if I am just a friend, I am a friend who has helped him quite a bit this year with his website, with an article for a cycling website (all for free) and I am in his country. Last year he at least sent me an email to welcome me back to Italia. This time: nothing. It might mean that he has a girlfriend, but really that is beside the point. It means that he is pulling a stupid trick on me. Why did he send me that stupid card last week?

I hate men. I hate that I think about men. I must stop. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

But having said this, I will say that today I had an epiphany. I was gloriously decadent.

I walked up to San Mineato in my high heels. I mean, that is nuts. I have blisters to show for it. But I wanted to walk proud and look good. I got stopped by a half dozen people thinking I was Italian though, so it worked a charm!

Then I decided that I wanted to have a really, really good lunch. I took myself out for an expensive rack of lamb, crostini, wine, and insalata. Delicious!

Then, we had our tour of the the Museum of the Duomo. Our guide was the best professor at the school. I was kind of reeling with fatigue from the food, but still I had so much fun!

And then Joan and I executed our plan to drink in the garden at the Four Seasons. We did that. It was glorious. I think we shot the breeze for something like six hours there. The sun set. We laughed. We drank. I paid a large tab. :) (We did not actually drink that much - two glasses each - but it was pricey.:)) Fun, though.

And then we went to a down -to-earth cafe for a coffee with a bunch of boisterous Italians walking by, took a nice stroll, and the waiter there brought me some free prosecco. He wanted to invite me to practise English with him...He was kind of sweet, actually, so I gave him my email.

Happy Birthday to me!

Fun day.

So let us not spoil it with what is utter bullshit. I don't like bullshit. The thing with M is that it could be very well that he doesn't want to complicate things by showing too much interest! He said that the last time. Or it could be something completely different. In some ways, he is a moron. It will be interesting to see what he suggests when he gets back; it will be interesting to see how I react. At this point, I have half a mind not to see him at all. On the other hand, seeing him is the only way to resolve this. ARGH. Either way, I am going to hurt a bit. Don't you just loathe reality?

So I didn't cut my hair today. Joan seems to think that the length is good but that simply I should deepen the brown. Am cautious about going darker. Would love to go shorter, but perhaps I'll wait. Who knows.

Well, shoudl go to bed. Must be up tomorrow all chipper and ready for another great day. I am so fortunate. I love this trip. Oh! And Friday teh girl from work who has the apartment here has invited me for lunch. And maybe I am going to Rome this weekend to see Giotto and Fra Angelico exhibits. I have to think on that one. Joan and I are also heading to a craft fair on Friday morning. And we have a plan to go back to the Four Seasons with more of the girls from the school before I leave. Fun! Fun! Fun!

I hope that this entry doesn�t seem insensitive to those of you for whom things are not going too well right now. I am thinking of you. XO Oops! I forgot to write my epiphany of today. I was sitting in my fancy restaurant at lunch and thinking I AM WORTH SOMETHING GREAT! I AM WORTH A GREAT LOVE AND A FABULOUS LIFE. How is that for an epiphany on the b-day, huh? Now I somehow have to figure out how to execute the fucker. I mean, erm, the good life. Not the other one...And here I was thinking about sleeping with him and having a jolly old time whilst here. I suppose I could take advantage of him...Well, whatever...

12:33 a.m. - 2009-05-14

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next

other diaries:

stepfordtart
ohell
awittykitty
annanotbob
manfromvenus
smartypants
fifidellabon
hungryghost
hissandtell