enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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It's always about money...

UUUUGGGGGHHH...two minute post.

I posted an all happy post this morning and then...I did my taxes.

I'm on an "I'm cleaning up all of the unfinished business in my life" mission at the moment. It's good, but my anxiety just rose about 800% from doing my taxes.

This is ridiculous, given what I do for a living. And I realized this: It's not what I'm doing that makes me stressed; it's simply the baggage from all of the years in which I didn't have any money talking. That fear comes up and bites you in the butt again! I mean, I'm getting a small refund this year. Also, even if I had to pay additional taxes I could afford to do so.

May I just say to the gods of anxiety that it really sucks that it takes FOREVER to get over BAD RELATIONSHIPS with people, money, etc. HORRIBLE!

OK. It is not easy to break the patterns of your life.

I have been productive today. I have organized some papers to dispose of and I wrote the article that Marco requested I write for him. I think it's time that I ate something. Not sure what the project will be for this evening! Last night I started reading Edith Wharton again (how I love her), so I can tick reading off the list.

OK...off to busy bee again. I just want to say how much I feel for those who also have suffered from an anxiety disorder. I feel your pain. I feel your pain.

I really need a coffee. I think I'll have to head down the road to buy one.

Maybe more cheery news later, e.g., about the cool knitting and sewing projects I'm about to start, and also about the studio course in Florence. Happy Sunday all!

5:56 p.m. - 2009-03-08

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