enfinblue's diary

enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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Cottage cheerfulness. Scroll down - pictures! And pics last entry!

When I am new I am new made.
As the new made moon.
As M@rtin Am!s declaring his novels
"feminist almost to their detriment."

New made.

That's the expression of the weekend.

What a great weekend!

I hope that you had the same.

I am just fresh-scrubbed and out of the shower.

This is the thing: The thing about the cottage is that you grub yourself up until you just can't take the grime anymore.

And then you get back to the city and you are happily, comfortably sweaty and gritty and grinning...and you scrub it all off and breathe a big...sigh.

Actually, when C. and I returned we went for a long, sweaty run. It was great. I was antsy after the afternoon in the car.

But seriously, what a great weekend.

If ever I again tell myself that I must move to Italy because I don't belong here, at least tell me to remind myself that that is WINTER IN OTTAWA talking.

I do still want to have an apartment in Italy. I maybe even still want to live there.

But I remembered that ONLY A JERK WOULD NOT LOVE MY COUNTRY.

It's just so lovely. And when you get out into the country the people are so laid back and friendly. It's...home.

And the trees! The trees! SOOOOO many trees! And so few people! (My ideal combination!)

And let me tell you...the boys! The boys! Very lovely. I mean, they stop the car to let one cross the road.

Yes, I know, they are driving pick-up trucks and one does NOT want to know what they are saying about you as you cross the road in front of them. But still, they have...charm.

And men who can use chain saws and lift trees and build cottages and blow giant rock cuts so highways can slice through the Precambrian Shield...oh la la!

(Really, I do like these men. And when I used to go home to the country they would show interest in me. But when you think about it, we know that within a week I'd be frustrated that they had never heard of Middlemarch. And they'd want to run screaming from a girl who would dissolve into a puddle of tears in the kitchen because she wasn't about to "accomplish anything big" in the world. So, that's that. ;))

We can all have imaginary hurly-burly husbands for a weekend now and then though, can't we??

Speaking of imaginary husbands, Swimmmy left me the best comment ever! It was to the effect of "You wear clothes well and so it would be a shame for you to not have nice clothes."

Really??!?!?! Swimmmy, you are welcome to be my imaginary husband any time. That is, provided that you are prepared to furnish me with your imaginary husband credit card numbers, and be imaginary husband - perfect and never tell me that my ass looks anything less than lovely in anything that I buy. ;-)

Soo, the weekend. Really, it was great. I slept for THIRTEEN HOURS last night. You see, just like Italy, my body said, "You're free! You're free! Relax and ENJOY." Divine.

Also, I had never met C's cousins, about whom he has always spoken so highly, in all of these years. He has an aunt who moved to the States and has two of the most wonderfullest cousins ever. Two girls, close to me in age. I just adored them.

They are both brilliant - a physicist and a public health researcher, both actually working in international development work - and eco-conscious and friendly and wonderful and Americans actually knowledgeable and interested in Canada! What a delight. Such nice people. Really, like I said: American hospitality and friendliness can't be beat, and when you find Americans with an outward-looking sort of outlook, i.e open to the world...even more wonderful. The best people to be around. Really, very nice. I just love these two women, and their mother (who owns the cottage and, tellingly, is also single - it was basically a girl household, including another aunt and her daughter; C and the daughter's boyfriend were the only boys on hand).

Which brings me to the important part of the story!

The important part is that BOTH of these girls are single. It's horrible. It breaks my heart. One is shy and has apparently always had difficulty dating. The other is more outgoing but likewise has not been able to find a partner.

Frankly, I AM SHOCKED AND DISTURBED. One is 34 and the other nearly 37, so they still have some time. But really, what makes me so shocked and disturbed is that THESE ARE WOMEN WHO SHOULD BE PROCREATING!

I mean, these are outstandingly bright, kind, thoughtful, life-loving and life-giving women who are SINGLE and CHILDLESS (and who would like their lives to have turned out differently). It's a CRIME.

I must tell you. It is a crime against humanity.

But whatever. What can one do? I read once that men fall in love with women not for how they look but for how they feel when they are with them. I think that there might be some sense to that. These women are so accomplished and so sharp that it would take a big man not to feel (to steal Fifi's word) maybe ensmallenated a bit by them? I don't know. But then maybe there are some underlying confidence issues in them that I do not see. Either way it is a shame. It is sad! And that is my rant for the day. Thank you for your patience. :)

Soooo...I feel as though I should share a few more pictures.