enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

good grief i hope it's not something ulcerous

OK. Well, I haven't gone out yet today. As predicted, I'm feeling rather lazy. :)

Actually, last night, I felt ill. It was in my upper stomach area. So now that my lower parts are sorted out my upper parts are rebelling? :)

No idea. I thought I was going to vomit, potentally, at the bookstore. Perhaps I drank too much coffee yesterday. I did drink an awful lot of coffee yesterday. I love coffee. And I restrict myself to one mug in the morning during the week. :)

OH I am so old and feeble!

So last night I made lentil soup. Yummy. I'm eating the remainder of it now. Delish.

When I woke up this morning my stomach was a little bit sore but not too much. Hopefully this will pass.

It's all quite funny, as I had noted yesterday how *light* I felt. After so long with this feeling of fatigue and bloating and so on I felt so easy. I could feel it in my limbs. My limbs were - are - so *floaty*, for lack of a better word. It's a weird thing to feel finally freed from something.

So I'm sure that the gluten thing has been a major factor. Perhaps I simply need to heal from the damage done.

Anyhow. SO last night I did the strangest thing: I pulled A Room with a View off the shelf. The book, I mean. I haven't read it in ages. I last analysed the book in high school.

SO there I am, sitting in my arm chair, critically evaluating the novel and thinking about its social context.

And thinking about buying myself an antique B@edecker for Florence. I have an old map book for Paris but nothing remotely similar for Florence. Just a thought. A weird thought, but a thought.

I was thinking something else...I can't remember. OH, I know...I looked at the pictures on the Gu@rdian website of the London Marathon.

I hate to admit this but whenever I look at pictures like this I feel a punch-in-the-gut desire to run again. It never seems to not come when a major marathon occurs. I wasn't going to look at the pictures today as a result of this, but C. was on the phone and telling me to look at the pictures and how funny was the guy in the Tarzan costume?

I don't know what it is: a reflex; a physical desire to sink into a memory?

Ah sigh.

The weather is CRAP here today. It has been so all weekend. It has made it more difficult for me to purchase my sweater yarn. It's much easier to buy summer yarn when the weather is sunny, I find. Likewise with clothing: I put on a black instead of a yellow or pink top, too.

It's too late now to go to the event that I was planning to go to at the writers festival.

In any event the poet scientist wrote to me on Friday to tell me that he was planning to go to the event with his recent ex-girlfriend.

What a funny coincidence with the fact that Am asked me at the charity gala last week if I would ever date the poet scientist. She was to have dinner with him the next day, so I knew that whatever I said would get back to him, and that she was probing me for info. to give to him.

So I said, "No. He's too dreamy for me. I need someone more grounded. He's a lovely guy, but..."

I didn't go into the bit about his comfort dating of his current girlfriend being the sign of a weak character.

And so am I surprised that he is going to the writers festival with her and that he would write and tell me about it?

No. Not one bit. Men are so predictable. Most of them, anyhow.

I just wrote a whole bunch of silly stuff about what the perfect guy for me would be, hasn't changed - professorial, dignified, interested in stuff, morally centred, funny...I don't know. It's impossible to say. My ideas on the matter never change, but the reality never materializes.

Why was I thinking about this? Oh yeah - because I was thinking that I *should* be at the writers festival, or at least out, because getting out to things is the only way that I will ever meet anyone. The only places I have met men even remotely interested in me lately have been at spinning and at the charity gala - the only things I have been to of late outside of work. Doh!

I can be quite stupid, really.

1:32 p.m. - 2008-04-13

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next

other diaries:

stepfordtart
ohell
awittykitty
annanotbob
manfromvenus
smartypants
fifidellabon
hungryghost
hissandtell