enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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A laundry list of the nothing that I did this afternoon!

You know, of all people in the country I should be one of those not afraid to do her taxes. Today, however, I saw the pile before me and felt...fear!

It's like I'm afraid of failing to optimize my return/refund, when I should succeed at this, sort of as when I was afraid not to run my best time in a race. And I've never been good with issues pertaining to money, likely because I lived with so little money and thereby awareness of financial stress for so long.

Hence, I'm listening to the dvd series "Pass through the P@nic" right now. :)

Gosh, I amuse myself. I'm a little self-contained whirlwind of mess! I'm a whole world of stress wrapped up in a little woman.

Actually, I'm doing well overall. I'm quite happy and sure-footed in how I'm handling my life at the moment. I'm being rational about my job - well, except when I'm at home on the weekend and not breathing from anxiety, because I can feel already that the week with all of its unknown crises is about to begin again - and I'm ready to do something about it when the time is right.

That's it. I will not bore tonight! I went for a walk tonight with C. I'm going to try to change my schedule around a bit to try to run in the mornings a bit before work. I'm sure that the new regime will work for about three days and then I'll fall off the wagon, but I'm thinking that it would benefit me to get onto other people's work and sleep schedules. We'll see. I always fail in this one.

:)

Ah, yes, I should go and read something. I was not very successful on that front today. I did, however, do all of my laundry.

Sleep well!

8:36 p.m. - 2008-04-06

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