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enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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A little bit overburdened, but I'm going to try to forget about it. Yes, the struggles are rolling off my shoulders as I write. :)

OK. So here's the deal: I'm hopelessly indecisive!

I spent the whole day looking at tours in Europe. Initially I was excited, and then, as usual, I realized that there is too much choice and I started second-guessing myself and all the rest. And then I read Fifi's entry about travel..and I remembered that travel often does leave one more weary than when one started.

At the same time, there are some nice tours that one can do. For example, a hiking tour of the Amalfi coast. The one that is most accessible and that has dates that I could actually take is a walking tour of Catalonia. I could start and end up in Barcelona and make a nice 10-12 days of it. Or, I could wait until July (I know, bad time to travel, only it's the only available time) and go on the cycling tour of Tuscany. Kind of a dream.

That one's kind of expensive though, on account of the fact that it is in July, so airfares are higher.

I could, alternately, go to either Florence or Paris on my own as originally planned, in a couple of weeks, say, and just walk around/take bus and local bike tours, etc.

Why is it so darned difficult for me to choose?

THe thing with the Kennebunctport trip is as follows. Pros: Amanda, meeting other people from Ottawa who are also athletic; the meditative process of working hard through the hills each day. Cons: Bush compound at the end of it ;); 160-170 km of riding a day, through the hills/mountains; stuff that doesn't interest me along the way, e.g. outlet shopping; potentially bad weather.

So the other thing that I did earlier today is face rationally that I was being too kind in agreeing to tutor that girl for the GMAT. I had envisioned that I would meet up with her once a week or something to help/discuss problems. She seems to want a bona fide tutor, and I simply don't have time for that. The friend who asked me to do it in the first place called me today and was talking about me meeting up with her friend three nights a week, to intensively prepare her for the test on April 29. WHOA! I mean, I'd have to do some prep as well. I may be nice and quick with math but I do need a life. In my view these tests are mostly about self-study, anyhow, with occasional help when you just can't figure out the problems and the offered solutions in the prep materials yourself. I'm not a slave.

You see, I can be entirely selfish as well. Entirely selfish. :)

OK. I've been feeling physically crappy all day, I regret to inform. I think I will go for a slight run, however, just to see if that makes me feel a bit more fresh. I should have gone out and caught some sun, but I wanted to sort out in my head the things that I felt I needed to do.

So does anyone vote that instead of going to Italy or Paris or something I simply take a week off in April just to hang around my house and enjoy the sun and read books and stuff? Any opinions on all of these would be welcomed. :) I often need a push, sadly, and C. is even more indecisive than I.

Oh oh oh! Mentioning C., I forgot to write that we went to the Latin American film festival opening night on Friday night. My lord! The film critic for the CBC locally is also the head of the Canada F!lm Institute (host of the festival). He might have warned us that the opening film would not only be a "visually well-filmed view of a mountain people in Peru," but a lovely piece involving incest, sex with minors by a gringo, and graphic patricide by rat poison.

Yeah. Not sure if I'm going back. The guy needs a degree in marketing. :)

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8:54 p.m. - 2008-03-30

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