enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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I'm too busy and yet completely inert

You know, I just found out that there's a place in Newfoundland called South D!ldo.

And they wonder why people call them names!

;)

I have a few lovely friends from Newfoundland. One of them, Roger, "Rog," wrote to me the other day, and flabbergastingly in response to the comment that I couldn't make the party given that I was en route to the ballet, told me that he had wanted to be a ballet dancer when he was a kid but couldn't because there was no teaching available in his small town.

I mean, this guy is kind of macho. He's the guy who never again wants to be married (definitely bitten when young and now shy).

So Billy Ell!ot!

I loved that movie. I confess it.

So I just googled my grandmother's favourite expression, to find out that it was said by Alexander Grah@m B3ll. My grandma always used to say, "One door closes, another one opens."

The actual quotation is this:

�When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.�

So cool in light of the "choice" article, non? :)

I was useless today. Not to disgust you or anything, but I had terrible stomach issues last night. I could not sleep. I tossed and turned. ANd I was right grumpy in French class. There were more students in class than usual and so I stuffed myself in the corner and contained myself by reading an article. I felt bored by life today.

And then I went into the office this afternoon and didn't do very much. I tried, sort of, in the manner in which i have been trying lately, which is not hard enough, I must admit. I can't quite seem to resist falling into boredom and dissatisfaction at work these days, which is leading me to be frozen rather than overworking as usual. I guess it's difficult to be motivated when one doesn't feel comfortable or appreciated in a place. It's not like me at all, so I'm rather worried. I can't afford to self-sabotage by underperforming. I must bear this in mind.

Anyhow. Today I was not well. I probably should have stayed home. But I never do.

Otherwise I'm rather fearful of the remainder of the week, as I'm wayyyyy overbooked. On Wednesday I'm at the furniture delivery charity. On Thursday I'm going to an Emm Gryn3r concert. Pretty excited about that. The other act will be Josh R!tter.

On Friday I have another dance concert. This one is going to be strange. It's Jan Fabr3 doing Angel of D3ath. We're going to be sitting on cushions. Not your usual trip to the National Arts Centre. I mean, usually the performances are in the big ritzy hall with the loges and everything. I'm thinking that I'd better not wear the dress. :)

On Saturday I have a party to go to. This very cool girl whom I know has for some reason invited me to a specific couple's party that she's holding to celebrate their engagement. I don't know these people. It's a party at which all of the ladies are supposed to wear white in honour of the bride, and all of the men are supposed to wear black in honour of the groom. I suppose if I'm lucky I'll meet my own angel of death therein. :)

Just kidding! There is no way that I'm throwing in the towel on the Great Dating Moratorium of 2008 so early in the game!!! (Sadly, honestly, I'm so glad not to have the bother of it! I'm one lazy she-devil!)

Anyhow. My problem is that I do not have all white to wear. I have a white top. But I do not have white pants. I mean, who buys white pants!??? Rich people, I say.

I'm just kidding. A hundred years ago only rich people here wore white clothes. Owning white clothes showed that you could afford to have someone wash them for you.

In any event, as you guessed, I do not have white pants OR a white skirt. I have no white bottom anything. So I'm thinking of wearing a white top with a black skirt. Which will make me look like a waiter.

On the other hand, it occurred to me that it could be fodder for some bad jokes - "I have the top of a woman and the bottom of a man."

Or, it could be viewed as me being my own man and woman all rolled up in one. That's kind of closer to the truth. A girl at work last week told me that she was not surprised that I am not dating. She said that I always seem to be self-sufficient and filled up with my own life. I was OK with that. It was not offensive. She said she hoped though that it was not a fact that I had completely given up.

Oh well. That is it. I'm going to be my own yin and yang!

I'm a ninny. And I'm not interested in dating another ninny.

Ah well. I think it's time to make some salad or something. I've eaten too much bread only, since I returned from work.

Cheerio!!

7:28 p.m. - 2008-03-03

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