enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

lame on four continents

A couple of hours ago I was leaving a rather upscale bistro after having had dinner - and paid - with the poet scientist, having changed into my running gear from my nice work clothes with the intention of running the four miles back into the city with my belly full of cheese.

Yes.

And as I zipped up in the foyer I wondered how many of the sophisticated patrons in the restaurant had noticed me slipping out in my running gear with my massive knapsack. And I further had the thought that "I've been inappropriate or lame on four continents, so why not stay consistent with this?"

Oh so sad.

I'm such a sad, sad character.

I suppose that I was feeling sad as the poet scientist had realized that his girlfriend was probably trying to call him since it was after nine, and so had excused himself rather suddenly. I had offered to pay so I didn't mind so much, but the guy is driving me nuts with his mixed messages.

I am not going out for dinner with him again.

He was all tender and kind and pleasant. He'd brought me cards back from Chile, from Pabl0 N3ruda's house, as he knows of my fondness for his writing. (He had even quoted Love is so short; forgetting is so long.)

And the bistro that he had spontaneously invited me to after our after work drink he reminded me was above the bakery at which we had first met more than a year ago.

I had forgotten that.

Men are irksome. Nothing but irksome.

Be gone!

So the restaurant is in a newly gentrified area and was very, very good. I had decided to milk the dinner for all it was worth and so I not only had a tremendously delicious wild mushroom risotto with white asparagus and a wonderful sauce that I can't quite describe, but had decided to have a cheese platter for dessert ALL TO MYSELF!

The cheese, frankly, was the best part of the meal - three varieties, with fresh fruit and raspberry coulis and very nicely toasted slightly garlicky crisps. I greatly enjoyed stuffing my belly.

So after the ps was gone, I had realized that the darned bus would require a walk and waiting out in the cold for half an hour. I loathe wasting money on taxis...so out came EB's trusty running shoes and running pants. Fortunately I even had a running top with me. I loaded up my backpack with my clothes, books, two pairs of winter boots, and...booted it.

And let me tell you, the run back into the city is not pretty. It goes first through a not-so-nice part of town, and then through Chinatown, and then through the downtown...to my neighbourhood. And by the time that I had reached the factory district and the bridge over the railway tracks...my stomach hurt so much from the cheese. Oh it was bad.

But I continued running!

Crazy EB kept on running. I ran and ran, and finally I reached home. Feeling more stupid and lonely than ever.

Well actually I was more bemused than anything (doesn't everyone eat an excellent meal and then immediately vigorously exercise so as to completely spoil the delightfully overstuffed, fatty feeling that results from consuming said meal?), but I'm inclined to feign self-pity so we'll leave it at lonely. The poet scientist I know was going home to a warm bed. I was not. I instead came home to find an eamil from B., who was looking for a document I had not known he had wanted and that I had not saved to the shared drive at my old job. I proceeded to spend half an hour looking for it and still could not find it. UGH! I so dislike myself when I am so utterly disorganized (which is shamefully often!)

I was so full of energy - even as I was running - but all of that seems to have been exhaled with my cheese breath. I'm sorry. This is a dull entry. All of the amusement is gone.

In part as I must sleep and prepare for day II of the microsimulation course from hell. I will not enlighten you as to why it is from hell. OK, I lie. I will enlighten you, as usual! I found the syntax of some of the model difficult to catch onto, although I eventually got it. There was only one other woman in the course out of 20 people, and for whatever reason she started laughing at me as I was asking one of the demonstrators for help with some syntax that I had missed. I'm seriously in I-don't-care-if-I-look-stupid mode. I'm going to ask questions. I want to completely understand things. Lord knows what this woman does for a living, but most of these people were senior government researchers or academics, so I suppose that she must be more knowledgeable than I. Why a person would laugh at someone else trying to learn...is beyond me. So much for woman power. Oh Bah Humbug! I actually have a suspicion that some people in the course were taking too many of the variables at face value and were not noticing the subtleties - my senior economist was zooming through but when I asked him a question he showed me the wrong variable and didn't seem to realize that there were some more subtle nuances in the variable and database tiers. I think I need to remind myself sometimes that slow and steady wins the race - it's OK not to be the speedster in these groups. Why are economists always engaged in p!ssing matches, it seems? (Rhetorical question.)

Ah well. Whatever. They did have good cookies to go with the coffee at the course though. And good cookies will go a long way towards happiness. Not quite as much, however, as good cheese.

Be well!

Before I go, one image from the run home. The poet scientist and I had started out at a scruffy Irish pub with a rather rough clientele, but when I ran by on my way home I saw the most delightful thing - a large group of musicians - bows in hand - assembled by the steamed-up window of the small pub. They didn't have music stands or anything but I imagined that they had given an impromptu concert. I wanted to stop in but cheese and running feet and being alone propelled me away.

11:45 p.m. - 2007-11-29

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next

other diaries:

stepfordtart
ohell
awittykitty
annanotbob
manfromvenus
smartypants
fifidellabon
hungryghost
hissandtell