enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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Nights of....Ottawa

Life is really good right now.

My best friend is in town and I get to speak with him daily.

I'm slowly moving past and beyond Larry.

About time, eh? :)

OH GOD YES.

I'm such a fool.

The thing is that I'm confused.

I've always been different.

I simply need to accept that different is not "wrong."

I don't want to embellish upon this, for some reason.

This night I sat slightly inebriated at a "Manet bar" after my friends--Alex and his girlfriend Susan--returned home. I read his poems and wrote my own. And I remembered sitting at the other end of the bar with Larry in December--a long-haired, unconfident, confused girl who was begging for a home in her new town. The wrong home.

Tonight I sat at the other end of the bar: I wrote my own lines--my own past and my own future. With a $30 eyeliner. :( Fool. :)

And it was pretty good. It was pretty beautiful, in fact--in the way that the English pronounce "beautiful."

I had crazy hockey hair from waiting out in the rain with the canoe club.

I have curly/wavy hair. So be it. When I'm standing on end I'm quite true, am I not?

I thought I knew myself tonight.

Imagine that?

You'll excuse the three pints navigating my systems.

I have a date for Bluesfest with a cadre of gay guys. Could be far, far worse. :)

Will write less cryptically again soon.

11:46 p.m. - 2007-07-04

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