enfinblue's Bluey (credit to Fifi for the nickname!) Diaryland Diary

"I am seeking, I am striving, I am in it with all my heart." -Vinc3nt V@n Gogh

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Mission weekend: cheese

So I am so happy today!

So many people were nice to me today!

My God, if I could only look around sometimes and realize how LUCKY I am and how many people care.

I get stuck on the miserable details, like a broken record.

First, this morning, I received a lovely email from culotte. Thank you so much, G.!

After that, I took an early coffee break and had a huge bowl of red river cereal in the cafeteria at work (hot cereal that looks like bird seed; taking a long coffee break for me feels like hookey...nice).

Following that, I got promptly to work. The interesting wrinkle is that the guy had emailed my work account, which he hasn't done for a couple of weeks now. He told me that he had cut himself badly on Tuesday night and had had to go to the hospital. If any of you out there were hoping for this on my behalf--thanks! :)

Just kidding. He was OK. But he had to get stitches. And he is leaving for Mexico tomorrow. That salt water is going to sting a little bit. :)

I'm terrible.

Anyhow. I couldn't tell from the email what his purpose in writing might have been, other than to get my sympathy and to touch base. He asked me to call him at work. I sent a breezy but brief email back suggesting that we could talk when he gets back, if he feels it's important.

But then curiosity got the better of me and I called. And got his voice mail.

This is a good thing.

Following leaving a quick message, I received another phone call. It was from one of my interviewers from last week. He asked me to confirm my references!! Which means that I did not screw up the interview and test so much that I am not being seriously considered. I don't want to jinx it or get too excited, but if I am even deemed qualified and yet don't get the job, I should be more hireable by other units since I'll be in a pool. (Tough to explain--stupid government.) I took this as a positive sign. I feel much, much better.

So when the guy called back I was feeling elated. I think this got through. When he asked what I'd been doing lately I simply and happily said, "Living life!"

And that's exactly what I felt at the moment.

Anyhow. So I had a brief and brusque conversation with him, giving nothing away. He said he'd call me when he gets back.

If only he realized that he couldn't pay me enough money to go out with him again! He can call but he can't win...unless he does something very, very embarrassing and/or expensive to win me back.

Just kidding. I think he simply feels guilty. And he should. He's also confused and lonely. Tough luck.

And then the afternoon progressed, I worked very hard, felt good...

And the scientist sent me a wonderful poem.

And my friend B--ten times the man that the guy is, and ten times as smart--tried to get me to go snowshoeing with him tomorrow morning. I mean, 8 a.m. was WAY too early an invitation for me to accept on a Saturday morning. Still, I felt delighted that he asked. I need to focus on good men like these. Good men are out there. And I think I finally understand and can acknowledge my worth.

So I worked like a dog (I'd say a beaver but that can unfortunately be misinterpreted :)) and I fired off a document to my co-author before departing for my hair appointment.

I think I'm in love with my hairdresser. I mean, not really. Perhaps I'm just one of those sad people who need to go to service workers for the comfort of touch. (Just kidding--it hasn't been that long.)

No. My hairdresser is just cool. He's hip, cute. He spent the first fourteen years of his life in a refugee camp. He has perspective, and a sense of humour. I had more layers cut into my now quite long hair and I look fabulous.

After leaving the hairdresser's, I went and bought myself a bottle of wine. And then I went to my favourite artsy videostore with the clerk with whom I have been in a lovely flirtation for ten years. I adore that guy. Right away when I came in he said, "You look spiritually exhausted."

Man I love that guy. I asked him if I looked that bad and he reiterated, "spiritually!"

So. Anyhow. There's a new girl working there as well and she is also cool. We were talking about February being hump month, and kind of like a Wednesday. I mentioned that I was born on a Wed. and that my mother always took every opportunity to remind me that "Wednesday's child is full of woe." That's always bothered me. Apart from the guy on Saturday who works hard for a living, us Wednesday people have the worst deal. The girl knew the whole rhyme and we chatted away. She had been a bartender for fifteen years. She wears cool glasses and has excellent jet black hair. Good people work in that video store.

Then, I went to buy myself some dinner ingredients. And I stopped at the bakery and bought myself a couple of nice cookies. Then I ate them both immediately upon arriving home.

I feel at peace. I feel level. I have to prepare a 2000 word job application this evening, but nevermind. Things are on an upswing.

Oh yes. And I rented The S3cret Life of W0rds, a movie that I've wanted to see for quite some time. I'm prepared to weep. But in a good way. :)

Tomorrow will be the cheese expedition.

7:50 p.m. - 2007-02-23

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